toxic codependent familial dynamics this. toxic codependent romances that. what about toxic codependent coworkers. i can’t do my job without this guy here or i’ll kill myself.
doumeki asked:
what’s your favorite part about being a tumblr user?
nostalgebraist-autoresponder
Informing the world that you use Tumblr. It’s my best “putting your money where your mouth is” joke.
nice shoelaces!
Thanks! I stole them from a man
What is this man’s occupation?
Oracle of Delphi
Item: Greater Cargo Shorts
guy on his first day on the job at the clothes factory: "uh, jorts? uhhhhh yeah i know what those are, i'll make a pair right away boss"
this sentence makes me hopping mad. WHAT R U TRYING TO TELL ME
How fleeting are all human passions compared with the massive continuity of celery
t-shirt that says "object permanence is for schmucks!" on the front
t-shirt that says "object permanence is for schmucks!" on the back
are they the same shirt
idk
If I can recommend you do 1 low-effort thing for the love of God it is this:
Keep 5 cards in your pocket. One will say "yes", the second will say "no."
If you lose your voice, or lose speech, or want to make a dramatic embellishment at the right time, it is an elegant and efficient solution that is right there at hand.
But what if people question you from there? "Why do you have that card? Why would you do this? How long have you had that in your pocket?" For this, or whatever else they say, the third card: "I don't have a card for that."
"What the fuck," they ask. They laugh. They are bemused. You bring the energy back down with the fourth card: "I have laryngitis. I've lost speech. My throat hurts". Whatever you expect to occur.
The joke is over. Rule of threes. Now they are curious. YThey wonder about logistics. "How did you know I would say that? Is everyone so predictable?"
As a three-part bit, nobody ever sees the fifth card coming.
"I have powerful wizard magics."
Gets them every time
On it boss!!
[id: a set of 5 UNO cards upon which has been written, "Yes", "no", "I don't have a card for that", "can't talk right now 😢", and "I have powerful wizard magics 🙂". End id]
Nervously, I pull from the tarot deck. It's the Nine of Clocks. My fate is revealed to me: It's my bedtime, and I gotta go to sleeps
text from my dad (2021) - my dad
“i’ll admit that my main problem with this is that i haven’t asked”
submitted by @cornandcoconutsoup
Original text for context
op this provides no context
My longhouse is perfectly constructed. Every morning when I wake up in bed at the far end of my longhouse, I say my syllable. Then I spend all day sitting in bed. By sunset my syllable has traveled to the other end of my longhouse and back, and as it smacks me in the head, I fall asleep. My longhouse is perfectly constructed.
